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What's your 'victory'?

Updated: Apr 22, 2020

What's your 'victory'?
Manish Srivastav

When I joined the Save Indian Family Movement, the Men’s Rights Movement in India, I too joined as a victim of gender-biased laws. When I joined, the movement wasn’t very old, though several scattered and individual initiatives and attempts to fight against gender bias in-laws were there, but they were limited to a certain extent, maybe because of resources or reach, and no synchronized movement was there.

When I joined the movement as a victim, I and Manuj were motivated and we started ‘Daaman’, an NGO to work for Men’s Rights in every possible sphere.

After I joined, numerous others too joined, all as victims, exactly the way I did.

Though, a fact rarely accepted, understood or propagated is that the Men’s Rights Movement has very little to do gender-biased laws. Still, there's a common theme among a large majority of those who reach out to us, their problems are mostly related, in one form or another, to the issue of the 'Legal Terrorism', i.e. 498A of IPC; and that’s an interesting part of what we get to do as an MRA or counsellor on gender-bias against men in society and laws.

We welcome and encourage all to be a part of the movement and stay even after they resolve their issues, for the sake of future generations. But not an inspiring number of members stay as the main target to fight for sometimes becomes anyhow to reach a comfortable stage in cases and go for ‘0 ALIMONY’ divorce.

The potential to fight and sail through these very new sets of circumstances differs from individual to individual. Many victims feel satisfied or mission accomplished once they achieve a strong position in cases and they get an offer for mutual consent divorce (hereinafter referred to as MCD) without alimony.


Here comes a twist in an individual's story which I wish to share with everyone! One of Daaman members, Manish Srivastav, denied the offer of even ‘NIL Alimony’ divorce and decided to fight for justice.

Manish is a respectable member of Daaman (now even more respectable after this new development), having his cases in Mathura. His first achievement was when he got 125 CrPC dismissed challenging the jurisdiction of the court. Pertinent to mention here is that his opposite party’s advocate is none other than a real family member of the opposite party.

With an advocate’s personal interest and one the biggest merits in lower courts in India, ‘अधिवक्ता का व्यक्तिगत मैटर है’, even the court was inclined to persuade Manish to go for the compromise.

The opposite party has been pressing Manish for MCD with alimony of around 5 lakhs, which kept reducing under the pressure of the way Manish has been contesting his cases travelling from Kanpur to Mathura on every court date, sometimes even twice or thrice a week.

But this time, just before Diwali, court pressurized Manish to the extent that he too agreed on MCD 'without alimony'. He was made to submit in court in writing that soon after Diwali vacations, he will cooperate and file a case under 13B of Hindu Marriage Act for MCD.

Then came Diwali, the world was celebrating but Manish was very disturbed. He met us and discussed this new situation in detail. He was even sent a draft petition for MCD and the opposite party readily agreed to whenever changes and modifications he asked for in the petition. But even after all possible help and guidance from our side, he was disturbed.

Then came November 1st, due date in Mathura court when he was supposed to sign for MDC. But instead of signing proceeding for MCD, Manish filed this application.

The Hon'ble court read the application twice and withdrew her pressure for MCD and without any question, proceeded with the next step in the case.

We congratulate and appreciate Manish for understanding his own pain like a man, the pain his family has gone through and the zeal with which he has decided to fight not only for his own self-respect but for the esteem, honour, and prestige of his family too, instead of just settling with NIL ALIMONY divorce.

We really appreciate Manish for the step he has taken to fight not only for his own self-respect but for the esteem, honour, and prestige of his family.

We wish Manish all the very best for his cases and life thereafter.


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