Updated: May 17
Men's issues not being heard is nothing new and efforts for that are on with a strong belief that we will be heard soon! In these efforts, we often come across few supporters and sympathizers who blow you up for a while with their reasoning.
A short anecdote, that happened with us.
While in Father’s Day celebrations last year, a couple joined us, on introduction we came to know that both, husband and wife were working in IIT Kanpur at respectable positions. They stayed with us for around half an hour and discussed men’s issues in slight detail. Both were curious to know about the cause, but the lady, while fully agreeing with us, casually raised an interesting point sympathizing with us. She said, “I can understand why government is not inclined to listen to you on men’s issues…. government must be considering that men are violent everywhere in general, existing laws are sufficient to tackle them”, then she started enumerating from property struggles between brothers, neighbourhood tussles, to terror incidents, mafia dons, rioters and what not.
I was taken aback, looking at her face, trying to understand if she is supporting us or mocking us! Though we often face sophistries, this one during the event wasn't expected.
The surprise amid an important event was unpleasant, to say the least! We clarified their ideology and after a bit of argument, they were convinced.
Historically, society rushes to help women who claim to be in distress and society ridicules men making the same claim.
When someone talks of rights or duties, it's assumed that the person at least lives in a civil society. One could be social or anti-social but is in society. Efforts of rights also seek legal rights, duties that one is expected to perform are also supposed to be as per law.
Our struggle for rights is wholly within the ambit of law, and in this too we don't go beyond demanding lawmakers for creation, removal, modification and alteration within legal framework, provisions and ecosystem, which we believe affect our interests and human rights disproportionately.
It's unjustified to equate an ordinary man deprived of his rights, with those who have nothing to do with law, those who presume themselves to be the law, those who believe in creating chaos in the society or those who carry sole motto to kill the humanity. Such people don't discriminate in gender, be it while forming gangs (their groups have both males and females) or victimising. However, feminism being a leftist ideology, one can find feminists and leftists sympathizing with all those who I would hate myself or my brothers to be equated with. Leftists and feminists are no different in harbouring the similar aim of creating chaos in society!
Does Same-Gender Perpetrator Offer Solace?
Female genital mutilation (FGM), also known as khatna or khafz is practised in India, in the Muslim Bohra community, and untrained midwives or older women in the community are usually the ones who carry out this procedure. The procedure is carried out usually with a knife or a blade, on girls aged anywhere between 6 to 10 years of age.
In FGM, does the victim girl receive solace from the knowledge that the perpetrator was the same gender? - Big NO! Even though FGM is perpetuated by other women, it’s still treated as a concerning problem.
So, the same-gender perpetrator cannot be a rebuttal to the existence of the problem, be the victim, be a woman or a man.
We also must not overlook the fact that there is an epidemic of violence against men in India and it happens all the time. When we get to read one death at a time, it looks like it's segmented, that it's not connected, but actually, it's part of a huge problem.
One must not ignore the fact that a very large number of men commit suicide annually, where prevailing gender bias against men is a cause in some form or the other, apart from numerous men who are killed by the hands of someone who thought they love them.
It's unfortunate that under the garb of hollow feminism, even the treatment of an offence varies based on the accused's gender!
Regardless of the gender of the victim, if the accused is a woman, it's seldom considered a 'crime'.
When we compare feminism and men’s rights movement, men have barely started efforts for their rights, and they are doing so against furious resistance that women could never imagine. But, unfortunately, there are significantly lesser people who look beyond gender, not only when it comes to the rights, well-being or safety concerns, but also treating crime.